politics are so personal
with a heavy (yet hopeful) heart
I attended Donald Trump’s father’s funeral with my mom and stepdad on June 29, 1999 in New York City. We sat directly behind Joan Rivers at the service. My parents flew into NYC from Virginia just for the day for the occasion. My stepdad’s late father and Trump’s late father, Fred Trump, had been friends, so my stepdad wanted to pay his respects. Once my parents arrived in Manhattan, they visited me at my office on 5th Avenue. I happened to work one block from the church where the funeral was taking place, so they invited me to come along. It was my lunch break, I wanted more time with my parents, and I was already a wearing all black (obvs!), so I joined them. This was before Donald Trump was a gameshow host or an aspiring dictator or a convicted felon. In 1999, he was just an eccentric, misogynist, racist, real estate miser, much like a real-life Ebenezer Scrooge. At my naive age of 23, I had no clue what this person would become. I had no idea that his name would be on my lips in the future any more than Joan Rivers’ name. After the surreal service, I hugged my parents goodbye and walked back to my office to finish out my workday.
heart chambers + echo chambers
I grew up in a family where politics were (and are) a taboo topic. Phrases like “let’s just agree to disagree” and “who we vote for is a private matter” and “politics aren’t personal” have come at me across the kitchen table over the years. There’s an air of conflict avoidance in it all. Most of the time, I’m so grateful to focus on what connects us rather than what divides us, and still, I constantly feel disappointment in how this particular brand of avoidance limits the deep connection and support I long for. I am blessed to have an amazingly tender and loving mother with a wide open heart who loves her family fiercely. So I can’t help but feel confusion, grief, and fear when Fox News is blaring through my parents’ house and psyches.
That’s how echo chambers and indoctrination work — so subtly, slowly, and covertly that people might not even realize what’s happening. Whatever our stance, we’re all part of some sort of echo chamber, by design of the algorithms we scroll, live, and breathe. I believe in actively seeking out perspectives different from our own and having fact-based and feelings-based conversations about our differences that evoke empathy for one another. Those are the conversations I crave — and, gosh, aren’t those are the types of presidential debates we should be watching? Not one person talking about policy and another blubbering absurd things about executing newborns and eating pets.
As I sit here at my desk writing about this, as a 48-year-old grown-ass woman, I notice how the little kid inside me still feels like I’m not allowed to talk about politics. But whenever I write almost anything — as as a person living in a female body, as a queer person, as the mother of a nonbinary-trans kid, as an entrepreneur/small business owner, as someone with mysterious health issues, as someone who doesn’t subscribe to any organized religions, as a mental health professional — I am essentially writing about politics because politics directly affects all these very personal areas of life. While I wish, with my whole heart and soul, that politics had zero to do with bodily autonomy, spirituality, and love, somehow it has weaseled its way into those private spheres, flexing an absolutely gross misuse of power. Also, let me clarify that while I’m registered as a Democrat, I am far too progressive to identify with either option within this limited, moderate, two-party system. Even so, I am absolutely voting for Kamala Harris in this crucial election because the consequences of Trump becoming president are dire. I’m so curious about YOU — the people who read my posts. If you wish to share anonymously below, please do. (I truly cannot see who votes which way, nor can other readers.)
his body doesn’t lie, but his mouth does
I briefly considered not watching the Harris/Trump debate last week because seeing Donald Trump wrecks my nervous system. His tone of voice and his posture trigger my many associations with wealthy, Silent generation and/or Boomer generation men who pat restaurant servers on the ass when they order their third round of drinks, call grown women who work in their offices their “girl,” and can’t be bothered to wear masks in public during Covid outbreaks. Trump fits that mold plus exhibits so many other qualities I find morally and ethically bankrupt. For the four years Trump was president, I avoided his image to preserve my own sanity.
Now, when I look at Trump, I try to do so through a lens of somatic psychology and energy anatomy, because it helps me see his humanity. With his puffed up belly and slumped head (the shape of so many men of his generation in our American culture), I see/feel his excessive third chakra (the energetic center for ego and personal power). Author Anodea Judith says that an excessive third chakra manifests as “controlling, dominating, bullying, constantly doing.” Trump’s false pride is so incredibly transparent, evidencing his immense insecurity and shame — though he is likely not self-aware enough to be conscious of it or, more likely, too psychologically defended to allow his insecurities into his own consciousness. While he’s a 78-year-old man, he often seems as though his emotional development was stunted somewhere in childhood, perhaps during the time he experienced whatever early attachment wounding he is actively and visibly protecting.
I am able to conjure some degree of sympathy for a human being whose trauma and/or karma in this lifetime is as heavy as what he evidently carries. He blatantly displays his vulnerability by publicly and loudly trying not to appear vulnerable. Yeah, I could stand to have more compassion here, were he simply the arrogant asshat calling a server “honey” in a restaurant, but he is a person seeking the most powerful job in the world, and he stands for every single thing I find harmful and dangerous about power. Trump has totally hijacked what the Republican party used to be and turned it into a clown show, which I imagine really sucks for actual Republicans and why many Republicans are now endorsing Harris.
In the debate, Kamala Harris demonstrated such masterful skill in pushing buttons to rile Trump into a flurry of toddler-esque rampages, sending him bumbling through meaningless, baseless, grandiose superlatives like “the greatest ever” and “everybody knows” and “biggest and most incredible…” in a sad attempt to soothe his own fragile ego. One of the biggest zingers of the night was when Harris said, “81 million people fired him. Clearly he is still having a hard time processing that.” As ever, Trump spewed absurd false claims (that maybe he actually believes somewhere inside himself???). Take a moment to read over few of them, highlighted and refuted by The New York Times, below:
all the feels
Post-debate, it seems glaringly obvious to me which candidate is intellectually, psychologically, and ethically competent enough to lead our country forward and which one is not. Sure, Harris isn’t perfect; she’s a politician who makes some decisions I don’t agree with. But she is a compassionate, moral, intelligent person who (bonus!?!) is not a sex offender, a racist, an ableist, a homophobe, a transphobe, and a convicted felon — and that’s sadly what it’s come to voting for or against. For an impressive (+ funny) take on this, click here.
While I am feeling (dare I say?) hopeful, I am terrified that there are still people in our country who will vote against the best interest, safety, and health of the vast majority of Americans. I am beyond sad that people I love may very well vote against my freedom and the safety of my child. I am angry that a lot of the people who might vote for Trump have been so mislead that they don’t even, in their beautiful hearts, realize that this power-hungry, self-involved man does not have their wellbeing in mind either.
do something!
THIS ELECTION IS SO IMPORTANT! Important enough for me to say that in all caps. In the past, we’ve been made to feel like we can’t really make a difference when it comes to politics, but in numbers, we can! What can we DO?
Vote. No matter what state you’re in! Be sure you’re registered. Make a voting plan. Get an absentee ballot and vote early if you can’t go to the polls on November 5th.
(Sure, Trump will try to overturn the election results if he loses and perhaps encourage his MAGA cronies storm the Capitol again, and sure, Harris may not be an exact match with you on every single issue, but VOTE ANYWAY!)
Donate. The Harris campaign will get outspent by Trump’s billionaires, because that’s who he appeals to. Even a few dollars will help Harris because the number of donors matters.
Volunteer with Rock the Vote or another organization that speaks to you.
If you have family or friends in swing states or red states, and if it’s not too traumatic, toxic, or unsafe in your relationship dynamic, have the hard conversations. Let them know how important it is, to your life personally, to vote for Harris in this election.
Pull a Taylor Swift. If you have a platform of any kind, use it now!
⭐️ If you haven’t yet clicked all the links above and below in this post, I encourage you to do so… to learn stuff, to have a laugh, or to inspire a dance! (You’ll see what I mean.)
following: I like
, former CNN White House Correspondent, for actual facts given in the calm way my sensitive system needs.watching: The Daily Show, to bring a dose of humor to it all. This one-minute clip is gold:
Whether you’re an unpaid or paid subscriber to prism, having a spot in your inbox is an honor I don’t take for granted. It gives my art and writing a place to breathe. Thank you.