Every spring, I crave desert warmth. There’s something about red earth, direct sun, brilliant succulents, and impossibly starry skies that soothes my ocean-born, now-mountain-dwelling soul. Taos, Santa Fe, Sedona, Palm Springs… This spring, I didn’t visit this magical climate, and my body deeply notices the void.
My last visit to the desert was with my coven in October when we went to Ojo Caliente. My December trip to San Diego offered a wee touch of the desert vibes I needed to get me through this winter. But there’s a specific light and energy of springtime in the desert.
I visited Sedona for the first time in spring about 24 years ago, and I’ve returned a few times since - each time glorious! I’ve lingered in Santa Fe and Taos in various spring trips since 2002. I held my baby blessing ceremony in Palm Springs in the autumn of 2006 when I was pregnant, and I returned to Palm Desert for Coachella with my best friend in spring 2018 (to see Beyoncé!).
Each time I’ve been to the desert, I’ve felt a part of my Self waking up. I don’t know how to describe the awakening other than it being a warmth radiating through to my core. My being experiences this climate as both a peaceful balm and an invigorating lightning bolt to my heart; I have a hunch that it’s about warmth.
Two years ago, I took a solo retreat to Palm Springs/Desert Hot Springs to soften into a quiet healing space after divorce. I treated myself to a stay at Two Bunch Palms, with an intention to reorient to warmth and to self. The trip was inspired by my having read fellow late-blooming lesbian Martha Beck’s book that had come out the spring prior, The Way of Integrity, where she advises us to “follow what feels warm” when making decisions. My inner compass pointed me toward the desert.
Ever since, I’ve been listening to my intuition to move toward what’s warm and to move away from what feels cold to my system. I aim to include more warmth and less cold in my day-to-day life. Whenever I’m deciding between/among things (shirts, restaurants, business decisions, with whom and how to spend a Sunday afternoon, etc.), I imagine which feels most “warm” to my system. It’s as if my body is a plant growing toward the light and warmth of what it desires. It’s like muscle testing, in a way. I’ve found that this practice leads me to more freedom and helps to orient toward my true essence.
On that Palm Desert solo trip, I soaked in pools of natural hot springs surrounded by the lushness of palm trees and bouganvilla. I engaged in a whole lotta woo that was included in my stay at that resort: I attended a past life regression course, a sage cleanse, a sacred path oracle card reading, a color symbology painting experience, and a tarot reading. I received a glorious, deep-tissue massage, took a yoga class, and ate overpriced food like date smoothies, soba noodle salads, and acai bowls. It wasn’t any of those things that felt particularly supportive. The healing wasn’t even in the precious alone time the trip offered; it was in the warmth.
As Martha Beck says to her clients, “I need you to get back into your body, and I need you to tell me what feels warm.”
While the desert has plenty of warmth in its dry heat, bright sunshine, toasty earth, and natural hot springs, for me the warmth I find there comes from the inside. Maybe my body is mirroring the climate it’s in, but there’s a magnetism and a rightness to it all. It reminds me of who I truly am, and I feel more free. I think I need to create a life where I am able to spend a week in the desert every spring.
I want to try to hold the feeling in my body all year long of lying on sun-heated, red rocks, and to seek things, experiences, and people who match that internal warmth.
reading: I just started reading This American Ex-Wife: How I ended my marriage and started my life by Lyz Lenz. Have you read it? Thoughts?
revisiting on podcast: If you don’t have time or interest in reading a book right now, you can hear Martha Beck talk about going toward what’s warm on episode 66 of We Can Do Hard Things, and often on her own podcasts: Bewildered and The Gathering Room
finding springtime warmth in: afternoons sitting in the sunshine on my front porch with the wilder of my two kitties, drinking in the scent of my lilac bush
in awe of: this week’s entry of
featuring the embodiment of love themself, . This one is NOT TO MISS. Holy wow - my kind of church — both videos and the audio clip in between:seeking: recommendations for how a non-camper like me should visit Joshua Tree for the first time, perhaps next year. Hit me up! 🏜️
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