mother is a verb

+ a note from my kid after my coming out + our separation

Next Sunday is Mothers’ Day. Because it can be a complicated and heavy holiday for many, and perhaps an outdated one, I prefer to hold it in my heart by considering “mother” as a verb. The Oxford dictionary defines the verb mother as: to bring up with care and affection.

Let’s be clear — Fathers’ Day also holds challenging emotions, too. And truly, as the parent of a non-binary person, I wonder why these holidays are gendered and specific at all because they don’t feel inclusive. Why can’t we simply have a Parents’ Day or Family Day or a Caregivers’ Day? Until the world catches up with that, this week I’m simply celebrating those who mother… celebrating anyone who mothers others, trans mothers, mothers who have have lost children, those who have lost mothers, those with difficult relationships with their mothers, those who have yearned or yearn to mother, etc.

I am one who mothers. I mother a 17-year-old firecracker lightning bolt with the softest center ever. Today, I’d love to share …